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I'm not a huge fan of your intro, as I'd have preferred offbeat eighth notes to straight 4 to the floor quarter bass, but you do a great job of solo writing and that I appreciate.

Something is happening at 1:09 and I don't know if it's recording software or a rendering issue. It sounds like the stuttering right before my project crashes, or when something isn't properly loaded. I had to double check it was really happening and I was not having computer issues myself to be sure.

It's hard to hear your tom rolls at 2 min. You can for shiggles pan them across the sound stage to give some space to the mix.

Beyond that I don't have much critique. The arrangement is fairly simple, with not a lot of elements changing throughout. Instead of the intro you currently have, I might have started with your pads and the intro riff, minus the bass. Nothing about your piece is inherently bad, but something about the bassline being straight quarters throughout, and the percussion being also pretty stepwise takes energy away from your blazing solos.

Same stuttering issue occurs at 2:34 also for note.

Other than that, good piece. Thanks for coming out to NGUAC!

Going pretty hard. I could only ask for some more of the sub to survive the hard clipping and a bit less clipping on those upper range frequencies past 13khz. Fuzz is lovely but when each instrument has a lot of it, you can lose sight of percussion, melody, samples, and any other FX you're pushing through the mix.

I'm wanting a lot more mid and low mid and there's not a lot here.

Otherwise, this is super nostalgic for me and makes me want to jump around the house like a crazy person. Great work.

Thanks for coming out to NGADM!

Nice detuned piano here. Or is that just tuning? I'm retarded in terms of that side of music theory at this point.

at 49 I can't quite hear what's going on in that bass and so it's a bit distracting as occasionally I hear rumble and other times I don't.

Castanets (is that what they are) could come down, as could your tubular bells, vinyl noise, and other accents. The main melody or counter melody is in your piano and drives the piece. It's a bit covered up with those accents. For the castanet specifically, or whatever instrument that is, an option with more varied velocities and attacks would be your best option.

Otherwise, fantastic piece. Wish there was a bit less abrupt ending.

Great work. Thanks for coming out to NGADM!

SomeGuyMusic responds:

Thank you!

Drop at 1:56 is where I feel this piece really shines. Feels much more opened up and less centered. Beyond that I don't have too much critique. Kick could potentially come down just a little, .1 to .3 dB, and snare could come up around the same amount.

The vocal sits in a good spot in terms of volume but I would like more subtle volume on the lower octave double. Your samples also could be louder. Perhaps more compression or even clipping on the vocal would help it sit better in the mix, and some stereo widening/delays. I can hear some subtle FX. Actually, I think I'd like to hear that vocal pushed a dB or two harder and see the difference. It gets buried a bit. Maybe up the high shelf on an EQ and see if it sounds crispier?

I also have NO IDEA what the vocals mean, but they rhyme. I'm guessing we're going skydiving? Haha. Cheers.

Thanks for coming out to NGADM!

SPIRALi responds:

Thanks! I love your constructive criticism! really thank you!

also, im in?

Very nice chords and vibe coming into 30. I think things could be panned a bit differently to suit the space of your pads. Also think this would go into modern hip-hop for the overall vibe.

This may be unintentional but I also notice you adding 2 new elements as you go to each section. That was some solid advice I heard years ago. Good on you. I also think you could move away from that acoustic loop every so often, as it's pretty distinct and sits right in the listener's ear long enough to get tired.

Aside from the abrupt stop, a fine piece! Thanks for coming out to NGADM!

Fantastic performances, mix, and writing. All I could ask is that vocals come up in the mix by a dB or perhaps a bit more, give a bit more space to them, perhaps a chorus or widener -- and take rhythm guitars down a tad. As it stands the rhythm guitar is more present than the most interesting part of the mix, your lyrics! Snare might also come up a tad for clarity.

Although I wonder if all that may happen just by bringing the guitars down a bit and then compressing. Worth experimenting with.

Well deserved front page. Thanks for coming out to the NGADM!

SpoonMix responds:

Thank you! I really appreciate your constructive criticism <3.

Yes, I get that a lot, people want my vocals louder in the mix.

My music "pegs" usually has guitars up front and the vocals just loud enough to be understood, also, I'm very self-conscious of my lyrics; I know there's a lot to improve :)

Album cover and title are so accurate. We spend so little of our lives actually living, and so much wasting it. Your strokes around 1 minute actually sound like keystrokes. That's an interesting touch.

I think the mix is a bit heavy on low end, particularly low mids on your steel drum.

The offbeat and switchups throughout make the piece pleasantly unpredictable. I think I'd like a bit less reverb on the steel drum and less of the 10khz and up range there.

Contradictions in chord and tonality at 2:32 are nice atmospherically and contribute to the pleasant confusion. Think I would like a bit more out of your hihats and percussion, and less out of those top chords. Low pass on them and some auto-panning???

Otherwise, niiiiice work. Enjoyed it a lot! Thanks for coming out to NGADM!

As I know next to nothing about jazz outside of the utter wizardry occurring here, I have next to no critique. I think however I'd like some more volume on the bass, a bit more out of your drums, and somewhat less spread on the lead in the outro solo. Perhaps have it panned slightly opposite the existing rhodes?

Otherwise, magic. Thanks for coming out to NGADM!

Simple and effective. Crazy arpeggios, and those characteristic transitions. Takes me back.

I would recommend taking some reverb off of your strings, shorter release time, and timing the attacks a little early for each note as when you play multiple notes in a series they get so muddy!

The quack in your guitar at 1:52 could come down some, and for all future quacks. Otherwise, well written! Nice work.

The transition at 2:33 was unexpected and is like two songs in one. Yay!

This makes me want to go nuts and produce crazy old techno shit myself xD

What was I going on about, oh, the clarity of the mix is a big issue, as I would like more umph out of your kick, more space on your strings -- two separate instruments panned somewhat left and right respectively should help. That talking synth in the background is sounding great but could come down a bit in volume for your outro.

Nice outro keychange. Fits well.

Your arps are nice and nutty throughout. Overall, fantastic. Really enjoyed it!

Thanks for coming out to NGADM!

StormLight93 responds:

thanks for the feedback, mastering tips are really appreciated. I will keep them in mind for future projects ;D

I think the new philosophy works for you swimmingly. Nothing stale, new elements added and taken away and nothing jarring about it at all. Some small critiques. at 1:58 or so, that lead isn't sticking out well against the reverbs going on. Some sidechained multiband compression there may help, as well as ducking reverb frequencies below 250 hz.

I personally am not a fan of the snare. I think it could be pitch shifted or warped a bit higher (snares have tonal qualities too, and resonances, and when pitched right, will fit more naturally in place!), or you could clip it more, or alternatively switch it out. Whatever you'd choose, I would also bring it up a little. It is sitting in the mix a bit flat.

Otherwise, love it. Great work! Thanks for coming out to NGADM!

supermelon-creations responds:

Thankss~ in my modern songs I tend to pay a lot more attention to those details, but still you are right, maybe I shouldve made an updated version, but thx for the critique

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