Hmm...
I didn't like this quite as much as I normally would. The sporadic beginning is a bit of a turn off. It almost sounds as if it's out of tempo with the rest of the song. The main melody is repetitive, but still good. I don't like the bass drop you did in there; it makes a very high squeal for a second or two before it drops out.
The rest of the song is fairly good, even if I think it needs more bass, not to mention reverb on the percussion track. If you want to make it more dramatic, pump up the volume of the SFX and add some reverb, etc. to make it sound beefier. Same goes for bass, minus reverb. You could EQ that into being beefy. I like the high synths a lot because they sound strange and good, even if they hurt my ears in the high octaves.
Good work!