I agree with John. The mix hits and misses in points. Your vocals at least are compressed well and not drowned... unlike the drums. I like the idea. Songwriting is good. Implementation needs work. Less reverb on those drums and more compression for them. They're hiding.
Your singing could use better intonation and a little more focus on the notes you want to sing. Sliding all around them with some portamento is fine but centering pitch is fundamental to producing a good sound.
Guitar mixing is hit and miss as well, sometimes even the tuning. I enjoyed the piece, but there's plenty of room for improvement. Keep plugging at it and you'll get there!